Thursday, September 20, 2012

Sharing just some of the best 3 years of my life.

Well actually more than 3 years. It will be 3 years on November 7, 2012, But Rich and I have dated and been together for over 5 years. We didnt get married as soon as possible, and it was good for us to wait, he had somethings he was working on in himself to make him a better person, and in hindsight we grew so much closer in those years before we were married. We didnt live together, we kept our own "stuff" and so when we got married it was the most wonderful time, to really now, then, be husband and wife. OF course it took me nearly 2 years to sell my condo so in hindsight we should have gotten a jump on that :) 

As some of you know our lives have never been without cancer. He was diagnosed 6 weeks before our wedding. He was at Mayo for longer than we had thought and we postponed our wedding, to be sure he was strong enough. We didnt send out invites, we just got the word out. We ran out of food at teh reception, either people were that hungry or morepeople came than we thought. It was perfect none the less. 

Here are just some fun pictures that make me smile: 

One of my very first triathlon's. Rich drove me alot further than i expected one dark morning. 

This is in Georgetown at my cousins wedding, Rich had just proposed.
It was my parents 51st anniversary, we ended up gettting married on their anniversary and will always share that day with them.

Cupcakes at our reception


I just like this one, i dont know where its from

Tuesday Night TT's with the botttle openers we won!

Mexico, winter of 2010 with  my parents I just remember it rained alot! I know! Mexico? 

Rich brought me to Arizona only a few months after we had met. I was suspcious of anything that didnt have an ocean. I am forever grateful bc Tucson has to be one of my all time favorite places. And to ride there, is Heaven. I will ride there again. I owe it to Rich, because he will be with me. 


Summer/July 2010 we did the Triple Bypass.
Dang, that was fun. All on a 23, i am now a sissy who rides a 27.

Honeymoon, sorry out of order. Rich had a colostomy, he had that for about 9 mos before they reversed it. He did more stuff with a "bag" than some of us do when we are 100%.



As you can sense we are in a tough place here. We have started hospice care and we are praying that we can keep him comfortable and help him on this journey. I think today as i write this its the first time i have written in my head, without losing more salts than i did in a race. Lots of tears. He is so strong and the Grace with which he has weathered more scars and more surgeries and more chemo's than you can imagine strengthens me to know that I owe it to him to stay brave and stay strong.

This is from New Hampshire. It pains me to say this but Rich isnt free now. He deserves better.
He will get that sometime, and his journey there will rewardhim. IF you arent a believer in God, then just move along, but for us it's been amazing to know he has better times ahead.


This picture is labor day 2012. Walking was getting harder and he was tired alot. Today he still smiles like this. That spirit will always be with me, even if physically he isnt with me.

Ok now i am crying again.
Thanks for all the love, you guys mean more to me than i can write. You have helped so much.
Keep at it, I know its going to be tough for me. you dont wait 40 + years to find your soulmate then lose him and move on.

41 comments:

Velma said...

I have been reading your blog for a number of years. You guys are so strong. I will be thinking of you and Rich.

Molly said...

Oh Julia. There is nothing happy about what you are now facing, but you are doing it together and you as always amaze me with the grace with which you handle it. You've got the right attitude, to be thankful for the time you did get together. Hugs and all my best thoughts to you both.

Teresa said...

My heart aches for you two and don't know the words to express how this post speaks. I see the love you two share and know the love will continue through the years. Cancer sucks and it multiplies to nore suckiness when its with people you love. Big hugs and praying for you both and your families.

Michelle Simmons said...

I'm crying now too. I'm so sorry. Cancer sucks. :(

Betsy said...

Of course I'm crying too. It just seems so unfair. You guys deserve so many more years! It seems ridiculous to say but I know this is how you view life too...be thankful for what you've had not what you've lost.

thepumpkinsdiary said...

I'm crying now too!! You know I think you're wonderful and I think about you all the time!! HUGS!! And I hope you have a wonderful hospice nurse.

Rebecca DeWire said...

I am crying now too. I am so, so sorry. This seems so unfair.

Rebecca DeWire said...

I am crying now too. I am so, so sorry. This seems so unfair.

Rebecca DeWire said...

I am crying now too. I am so, so sorry. This seems so unfair.

Beth said...

My heart truly aches for you Julia. Cancer is so unforgiving. I am so, so thankful that you guys are believers and can take comfort in God's plan and that you and Rich will eventually be together again in a much better place. Many, many prayers for you both.

Angela and David said...

You both are so beautiful and this is so unfair. I'm so glad you both such a strong faith. And I'm so glad you've had the time you have had together. Cancer sucks but maybe you valued every second together a little more than those of us have who haven't had cancer looking over your shoulder.

And you know I mean it, anything, you name it, and I am there to help you.

Tawnee Prazak, M.S., CSCS said...

Just like everyone else, my heart goes out to you guys. I am so sorry. Truly at a loss for words... just know you have someone praying for you and thinking of you over here on in So Cal. xo

sallyaston said...

Such a beautiful post and such strength from both of you. So inspiring and a reminder of how precious it all is, yet it really is not ours at all. Take care!

ironmomma.com said...

Beautiful. As are you sister. Prayers and love to both of you.

Steve said...

xo to you both. :( wahhhhhh.

Luv ya. You know that though. :)

really no words... I have no idea what to say...

Maggs said...

Julia, I am so sorry to hear this. My thoughts are with you.

Melissa said...

I'm thinking of you both a lot Julia. :-( Not everyone is lucky enough to have found their perfect love, you both have been blessed. My heart breaks for you guys and your family.

Damie said...

I had to force myself to read this. I have been thinking about you and Rich every single day. xoxox

cheryl said...

Lots of tears down here as I read this,although I know its nowhere near the tears you have cried. Be brave Julia. We all love you. XO

Jennifer Harrison said...

Ok, I am laying in my hotel room in tears as I read this. Thank goodness I am not alone! I DO think about you and Rich everyday, you know that. CANCER SUCKS...and it is NOT fair.

I wish I lived closer - I would help more than ever....and take you swimming and out of tea. OR chocolate.

Thinking of you both xxoo

marian said...

you are so strong under such challenging times, writing about the joys when your heart is breaking. i wish i could carry some of the weight for you. sending you strength and love and an easy passing for rich when it is time. xo

Anonymous said...

I'm a lurker but have been reading your blog for a year (and I'm from Hanover, so share the Dartmouth connection).

My thoughts and prayers are with Rich and you. So glad you had good years together, and that you have so much love to give each other. Dammit, now I'm crying too.

The Miller Family said...

Hey Julia and Rich,

My thoughts are with you both. You are blessed to have found each other and it is apparent that the love that you shared was just special.

You are amazing.

Amytrigirl (aka Amybee) said...

Julia:

warm, warm hugs to Rich and to you.

your FB pal, Amy

ADC said...

Oh Julia, I am in tears and I can't stop thinking about you guys. This is just not far. You two are just such wonderful people and strong. There are so many people out there thinking of you and praying for you. Just stay strong. Lots of love from your British friends.

Jennifer Cunnane said...

I cannot stop thinking about you and Rich. Your strength is unbelievable and I just cannot imagine dealing with what you are going through. I am sendng prayers and love to you both and a big hug.

Jennifer Cunnane said...

I am in tears and just cannot fathom what you and Rich are going through. I think about you two often, and am in awe of your strength. Thank you for sharing such beautiful memories!

Eclectchick said...

Such a lovely post at such a sad and tremendously difficult time. I am awed by your grace and courage and your ability to share it with us. Thinking of you both very, very often and giving you hugs in my heart.

mtanner said...

I just had to comment after reading this yesterday at work. I couldn't comment yesterday because of tears. I admire your strength and grace. You both will always be together in your heart and your mind. Don't ever lose sight. Your friend from afar~

Kim said...

Julia, my heart aches for you and Rich. Thinking and praying for you both.

d said...

all our thoughts are with you.

d said...

all our thoughts are with you.

Pharmie said...

This brought tears to my eyes, too. It just plain sucks, and there's really nothing to say besides we will keep you in our prayers :(

Jennifer said...

Thinking of you both every day. You have a lot of beautiful memories that will be with you forever. I know it is hard, but please try to take care of yourself, too. Thinking of you always, Julia.

Soul Rider said...

My heart aches for you, I wish I knew the right words to say...
I'm thinking of and praying for you both. I continue to be amazed by your strength and grace.

L~

Kim said...

I'm pretty new here to your blog Julia. I too am a JHC athlete.
I am so, so sorry. I cannot fathom what you're going through at all right now, but just want to offer my sympathies and support.
May your memories stay strong forever. Love prevails all.

Kim said...
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Ange said...
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Ange said...

Julia, I wish I lived near you and could come hold your hand. Prayers for you every day.

Libby said...

oh my love I'm crying reading this. you guys have spent some special years together and rich is an amazing person as are you. beautiful post. stay strong. thoughts with you every day as always.

Marit C-L said...

I just read this now....

I am thinking of you both - and my heart aches for you and Rich. You guys are amazing people and have both deeply touched my life. I am so sorry - but I don't know what to say. I love you guys - and will give you a giant hug on Saturday.

Just like everyone else who read this post - I'm crying as well. xoxo <3 !